Day Four: Crying Time

So today I have to write about a song that makes me sad. I’ve really not been looking forward to writing this entry. Not that I don’t enjoy an occasional sad song but they do have a way of sending one into a misery spiral. I’m currently especially susceptible to spiraling out of control. I actually did a mini spiral yesterday as a matter of fact. A few weeks ago I was laid off from my job, shortly thereafter I embarked on an epic excursion down the east coast, flew to the west coast, then went on to the Midwest (home), then came back again. It was a wonderfully exhausting two and a half week journey which left me completely emotionally wiped out and a bit emotionally confused as well. Yesterday I had a second interview for a dream job, which I may have (pretty sure I did) totally bombed. Today has been spent replaying all of the asinine things I said over and over again in my mind. Today I had an interview for a job that seems pretty awesome, at which I think I did well (fucking nailed it!). Only time will tell. For some reason though, all of these life events have melded together into one gigantic emotional roller coaster. Yesterday I completely spazzed out for reasons that are totally illogical. Today, under the same duress, I held it together just fine. What gives? I actually spazzed out because I could not control how much I was spazzing out. And then spazzed out some more at how ridiculous my spazzing out was (is?) Following which I downed some St John’s Wort and tried to convince myself that it actually does work. Anyway, I do not feel completely confident in my ability to judge sad music at this current juncture in my life for fear I will inadvertently set off another spastic cycle of doom. I am totally emotionally tumultuous right now.

On the other hand, what if shirking my perceived responsibility to writing today’s blog also triggers an abysmal downward spiral? Like, “I set one goal for myself, to spend the next 30 days writing about one song a day and I can’t even make it to the fourth day! I am a worthless piece of humanoid garbage.” Seems feasible, a bit hyperbolic, but (for me) very feasible. The latter seems far more serious/likely than the former. So, I guess I’ll don my “No Fear” apparel and stare down this mission with a fierce “I’m tough as nails” glare (and a bit of whiskey-why not? everyday is Saturday for the unemployed) and get right back in line for another go on this emotional roller coaster that is my life.

*30 Minutes Later*

I have been going through songs and decided to take myself up on my offer to have a drink. I found some Dewar’s which I then mixed with one part stale lemon seltzer water and one part flat ginger ale. A sad drink for a sad task. Choosing a sad song is a rough game to play for those of us who are ultra sensitive. Anyway, I’ve almost got it narrowed down to 15 songs (hikes!).

*45 Minutes Later*

So I went into this thinking that ultimately I would write about “Hurt,” comparing and contrasting the Nine Inch Nails Version with the Johnny Cash version. I think this song is perfect because no matter your mental state pre-song, post song you are left an emotional wreck. In a vacuum, this song would always produce the same despairing results. I really wanted to shy away from choosing a song that is sad for reasons I have attributed to it. Now, after drinking half of my “delicious” beverage, I now feel like totally devolving from the original plan and really diving into the abyss that is my Id (totally referencing Freud right now-learn about it). Anyway, I still haven’t chosen a song, so it remains to be seen what the outcome of this unfortunate experiment involving alcohol and blogging will produce.

*1 hour later*

The process of choosing a song for this entry has been pretty grueling, and, as originally feared, it did in fact instigate a spiral of the downward nature. However, I took a breather and crisis was averted. I am going to somewhat “cop out” on this entry though. I previously stated that I didn’t want to choose “Hurt” because it was too obvious. Well, I am going with an equally obvious selection, mostly because its sadness is undeniable. Unlike “Hurt” it is also heartbreakingly melodically beautiful. Today’s song is Jeff Buckley’s version of “Hallelujah.” Written and originally recorded by Leonard Cohen, “Hallelujah” (the Buckley version) was first brought to my attention through the tragic and untimely death of Marissa Cooper, the ill-fated Newportian teen of the hit T.V. show the O.C. (R.I.P). Since that moment, this has been my ultimate go to sad song. The lyrics are beautifully crafted; an enigmatic mixture of the elusively cryptic and the unabashedly human and honest. Jeff Buckley’s vocals are powerful, disturbing, mournful, and real. The instrumental leg is core twisting in its melodic simplicity. It really is a finely honed human sadness factory.

Sorry, no elaboration on my personal emotional baggage. Getting uncomfortably personal on my blog remains a project for another day.

Hallelujah

Well I heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do ya?
Well it goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall and the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Well Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
she tied you to her kitchen chair
And she broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Well baby I've been here before
I've seen this room and I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew ya
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Well there was a time when you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show that to me do you?
And remember when I moved in you?
And the holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Well maybe there's a God above
But all I've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who'd out drew ya
And it's not a cry that you hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen in the light
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah <<(held for a long time)
Hallelujah

Sad Songs:

• Flaming Lips-Do You Realize (mortality seriously bums me out)

• Patsy Cline-Walking After Midnight

• Kanye West-Street Lights

• June Carter Cash-Ring of Fire

• Imogen Heep-Into Dust

• Band of Horses-The Funeral

• Hole-Take Everything

• Elton John-My Father’s Gun

• The Cranberries-When You’re Gone (missing people is what I do now)

• The Church-Under the Milky Way Tonight

• Bruce Springsteen-I’m On Fire

• Bone Thugs-Cross Roads

Next up:

A song that reminds you of someone

Day Three: A Song To Be Happy To

There are a lot of songs in this world that make me happy. Maybe thousands. Maybe hundreds of thousands! Today, all I have to do is just choose one of them. Thankfully the wording is “happy” not “happiest” or else there would have been much more deliberation. As it goes, I can be lazy and just pick any old song that makes me happy.

Today’s song is a doozy. She has been making me happy for a few years now, ever since I saw her performed duet style at Tailgate Sports Café’s Karaoke night in Minneapolis by two thugged out white dudes. It was the most random and awesome merging of unlikely space, people, and song I’d ever experienced. Since that fateful evening of years past this song has been popping up in my life at random intervals, in all situations, making me sublimely happy.

So here it is: Nitty Gritty Dirt Band’s “Fishin’ in the Dark”

It’s probably the Minnesotan in me but I totally romanticize late spring/early summer and, big surprise, so does this song. I love that it totally manages to capture the exact feeling of a summer evening spent with a person you deeply care about. It’s not about fishing really; it’s about being outside on a warm evening, falling/being in love, and appreciating the stars. I’ve totally experienced nights like this and I’ve never even been fishing (as an adult, although I’m sold on it as a concept, thanks NGDB).

Lyrics

Fishin in’ the Dark

By Nitty Gritty Dirt Band

Lazy yellow moon coming up tonight
Shining through the trees
Crickets are singing
And the lightning bugs are floating on the breeze
Baby get ready

Across the field where the creek turns back
By the old stump road
I’m going to take you to a special place
That nobody knows
Baby get ready
Ooo ooo ooo

You and me going fishing in the dark
Lying on our backs and counting the stars
Where the cool grass grows
Down by the river in the full moon light
We’ll be falling in love in the middle of the night
Just moving slow
Staying the whole night through
Feels so good to be with you

Spring is almost over and the summers comin’
The days are getting long
Waited all winter for the time to be right
Just to take you along
Baby get ready

And it don’t matter if we sit forever
And the fish don’t bite
Jump in the river and cool ourselves
from the heat of the night
Baby get ready

Ooo ooo ooo

You and me going fishin in the dark
Lying on our backs and counting the stars
Where the cool grass grows
Down by the river in the full moon light
We’ll be falling in love in the middle of the night
Just moving slow
Staying the whole night through
Feels so good to be with you
And me going fishing in the dark
Lying on our backs and counting the stars
Where the cool grass grows
Down by the river in the full moon light
We’ll be falling in love in the middle of the night
Just moving slow
You and me going fishin’ in the dark
Lying on our backs and counting the stars
Where the cool grass grows
You and me going fishin in the dark

More songs that make me happy:

• The Beatles-Paperback writer

• Dock of the bay-Otis Redding

• Belinda Carlisle -Heaven is a place on earth

• Elton John-Tiny dancer

• Prince-Seven

• George Michael-Faith

• Lupe Fiasco-Go Go Gadget Flow

• Big Tymers-Still Fly

• Fats Domino-I’m walking

• The Who-Pinball Wizard

• Queen-Bicycle Race

Next up: A song that makes you sad

Day Two: My Least Favorite Song

There are many songs in this world that I do not care for. Many of them I absolutely 100 percent hate. Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” is the superlative form of this. Now, just to set the record straight, I am not a Beyonce hater, she’s alright. However, I’m not totally in love with her either. I am also not a hardcore feminist by any means (although I firmly believe in equality) but a lady referring to herself as “it” gets my inner Betty Freidan all sorts of riled up. Not to mention it sounds a bit like a quote from "Silence of the Lambs." Creepy town! Is it not enough that women are constantly objectified, do we really have to objectify ourselves in our own dance music? Really?!?!

On the surface this song presents itself as promoting single lady solidarity. It plays; ladies get up and do the silly dance, and pretend they are not hoping some dude notices them. Why even bother with the farce? There are definite perks to being a “single lady” and this song does not espouse any of them. The charade is: we’ll pretend to be happy being single until we are in a relationship. I’m not saying all “single ladies” should be content being “single ladies.” If that is not their tea cup, fine. I just don’t know what the point of pretending is. Being a single lady can be awesome. Why can’t it be celebrated rather than seen as a period of biding time until a man scoops you up?

One of the most obnoxious things associated with this song is it’s prevalence at weddings. Let’s put all the drunk, sad, pathetic, “single ladies” out on the dance floor and see what happens. It’s cruel. It should be noted that in this context a “single lady” is an unmarried lady, the fact that said lady may be in a relationship that has spanned nearly a decade is unimportant. If “it” doesn’t have a ring on “it” then “it” is a “single lady” thus “it” is forced to gyrate in a group of other “single ladies” with “its” hand in the air T-rex style. Maybe I’m overreacting (tis my nature) but the more I think about it, the more I feel as though this song is an elaborate self congratulator for non-single ladies.

Anyway, if not having a ring makes me single, then I am single and proud.

p.s.-The music video for this song is alright.

Now Let us take a moment to deconstruct this monstrosity line by line:

Single Ladies Lyrics

All the single ladies (7x)-7x too many, uh burn

Now put your hands up -Nothing wrong here

Up in the club, we just broke up –Still no problem, dancing is a perfectly acceptable emotional outlet

I’m doing my own little thing-Seems like a decent plan. Although I don’t know why her thing has to be little.

you Decided to dip but now you wanna trip
Cuz another brother noticed me-seems like a variance from “doing your own little thing” but still, no real problem yet. Although she has not provided any proof that said ex is actually “tripping”

I’m up on him, he up on me-Let the mind games commence

dont pay him any attention- Who are we not paying attention to? The jealous ex or the groper?

cuz i cried my tears, GAVE three good years
Ya can’t be mad at me-Not exactly sure what there is to be mad about?

[Chorus]
Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it-There is just so much wrong with this sentiment, would a “ring on it” really have fixed anything? Do ladies really need to portray the notion that they can be bought with diamonds?

Don’t be mad once you see that he want it-just because someone wants to dance with “it” does not mean they are agreeing to purchase “it”

If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it-Seriously though, it comes off as supremely jaded.

wo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh x2-I actually really like this part.


(Chorus)Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it
Don’t be mad once you see that he want it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it-Do we really need to hear this nonsense repeated so incessantly?


I got gloss on my lips, a man on my hips
hold me tighter than my Dereon jeans-Seems a bit vindictive to me. P.s. Beyonce, we all know your hot, do you need to rub it in? Also, nice plug for Dereon (apparel by Beyonce), it really elevates this song to Jingle status.

acting up, drink in my cup-Needing liquor to have a good time is a sign of a serious substance abuse problem.

I couldn’t care less what you think-Obviously you care, a lot.

I need no permission, did I mention- If “it” had a ring on “it” it would still need no permission.

Dont pay him any attention-very mature, not.

Cuz you had your turn-are you a carnival ride?

But now you gonna learn
What it really feels like to miss me-threat level orange.

(Chorus)

Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it
Don’t be mad once you see that he want it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it-IT NEVER ENDS!!!!!

woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh oh 2x-taking a hater break. Dancing it off.

Don’t treat me to the things of this world
I’m not that kind of girl-I think these words are strung together purely to make sounds. Good luck finding a dude who treats you to unworldly things. Maybe that’s why “it” doesn’t have a ring on “it”

Your love is what I prefer, what I deserve-Is this referencing the non-putter a ring-on-it-er?

Is a man that makes me, then takes me-Yuck! Like a perverse teacher student like fetish? I see.

And delivers me to a destiny, to infinity and beyond-Oh, she wants Buzz Lighyear or someone to take her to see “Toy Story”

Pull me into your arms
Say I’m the one you WANT-Insecurity-1, Self-confidence-0

If you don’t, you’ll be alone
And like a ghost I’ll be gone-Placate this Bitch or there will be no making then taking. Also, your simile sucks ass.

All the single ladies (7x)-7x?!?! for real?!?!

Now put your hands up-too exhausted.

woo oh ooh oh oh ooh oh oh ooh
oh oh oh 2x- The charm of this phase of the song has completely eroded

Cuz if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it-WHY!?!?WILL IT NEVER STOP!?!?

Don’t be mad once you see that he want it-Desperation is decidedly unattractive

If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it woo oh ooh 2x-really though, how could anyone like “it”?

Runners up:

• The Offspring-“Pretty Fly for a White Guy”

• LFO-“Summer Girls” (“I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch etc. . ." )

• Barnaked Ladies-“One Week”

Next Up: A song that makes you happy

Kyle's Badass Birthday 80's Style Montage!!!!

I made this really awesome video for Kyle for his birthday. Even though I went almost a month over deadline, I think it's still pretty awesome. It gives a good sense as to what our lives as domestic partners have been like up until now (technically up until a month ago, a lot has happened in the last month that is not represented in this montage). As a lover of cheesy 80's montages to awesome soundtracks (ala "Valley Girl", "Thrashin'" and "Girls Just Want to Have Fun") I have created this video with a similar sense of whimsy and panache. Most of the peeps I have come to care about in my adult life are also represented.

Day One: My Favorite Song

Today marks the beginning of my personal 30 Day Song Challenge journey. The rules are simple. Every day I choose a song that corresponds to a preset list of categories. Today’s is pretty straight forward- my favorite song.

The choosing of a favorite song seems pretty simple. It’s the one song that has been with you through good times and bad. It’s there for you when you need it and sits passively in its designated itunes space when it is not. In my life, I have had many favorite songs. Many of them were fleeting flirtations lacking longevity and any real substance. Designating a tried and true favorite song is not as simple as it seems. There are many criteria to be considered, some being:

• How long have you and said song been together
• How much is your happiness quotient increased by said song
• Does said song make you excited to be alive
• How many/what memories have been attached to said song
• What is it about said song that speaks to you so personally
• Does the knowledge that said song exists increase your faith in humanity
• Does said song bring about any feelings of negativity or horror-if so, then it may be time to dump said song as favorite

These are a basic things to ponder when choosing a favorite song. Mostly though, what appeals to our senses about our favorite song falls into that cavernous abyss where language is of no practical value. Our reactions to our favorite songs appeal to us on an emotional level. For me and my favorite song, the reactions are not only based on nostalgia and emotion but also on the fact that the song has a physical effect on my being. No matter how many times I have heard this song, it still sucker punches me in the gut whenever it plays. It literally makes the hair on my arms stand on edge and sends ice cold shivers down my spine. If happenstance brings it into my life at an inopportune moment there is a good chance I will internally tweak out.

Purple Rain, the album and title track, were a staple in my home as a child. The album and movie were released in 1984, the year of my birth, and showcase my beloved hometown, Minneapolis, Minnesota. Lucky for me, the late 80’s brought us an amazing fitness craze in the form of mini-trampolines (mini tramps) and I spent many an hour bouncing the day away to Prince songs. My mother’s furious crush on the purple God ensured that a Princeless day was a rarity in our household. This also led to the inevitable Prince back-lash I contracted as a tween-to-teen. I turned my back on the Minneapolitan legend, writing him off as a dated has been. He was someone of my Mom’s generation whose sound had become archaic and represented all that was tacky about the 1980’s. It wasn’t until my Senior year in High School when I would find Prince again.

During my Junior year of High School my friendship group shifted and broadened. For the first time I had a legitimate circle of friends and with that came exposure to a variety of likes, interests, drama, and tragedy. The last day of Junior year was spent traipsing around the Twin Cities, and eventually rural Wisconsin, with these new(ish) friends. One of them had been an acquaintance whom was slowly blossoming into a friend. As I found out later that summer, at his funeral, his favorite album was Purple Rain. The loss of life of someone so close and so young was shocking to us who were barely emotionally equipped to deal with such tragedy. We spent many a humid summer evening driving around blasting the Purple Rain album and attempting to deal with the gamut of emotions barraging our adolescent senses. Although I cannot claim him as a close personal friend I was profoundly changed by his passing and still attribute him with giving me back my favorite song/album.

A few years later I found myself, at the age of 20, entering into the cohabitative phase of an increasingly serious relationship. Through this domestic partnership a record player was brought into my life and a love for vinyl soon flourished. My first outing to specifically buy records happened the summer of 2004 at a small record store in Saint Paul named Roots Cellar. That day I bought George Michael’s “Faith”, Tina Turner’s “Private Dancer”, The Pointer Sisters “So Excited!” and Prince’s “Purple Rain.” The album cover features him on his motorcycle clad in a purple velvet jacket in a seedy Minneapolis alley with Apollonia 6 posing seductively in a nearby doorway. Afternoons were spent that summer blaring Purple Rain and dancing. Later, we found ourselves with dog. Often I would sweep my little bundle of canine bliss up in my arms and slow dance him around the apartment to the epic ballad.

Purple Rain the movie holds a special place in my heart because the main setting, First Avenue, has been a seminal establishment in my development. From the variety of amazing shows, to SNDP (Sunday Night Dance Party), to Too Much Love (the current incarnation of SNDP only on Saturday nights), First Ave has marked some of the most important moments of my maturation process. Plus, the final scene of the movie when Prince performs Purple Rain, proving all the haters wrong, is so completely badass that you have to give the dude major props.

I have seen Prince live twice. The first time was with my best friend, Ned, at Excel Energy Center in Saint Paul, MN . The tickets were expensive, our view was obstructed, and I was completely unfamiliar with the Musicology album, but even so, Prince brought it. The second time, which happened a little over two weeks ago, was at the Forum in Los Angeles with my BF Kyle and our lovely friends Chris and Margaret. Although we were a bit far up, this past Prince experience was a game changer. He brought energy the likes of which I have never seen. The man gyrated, showcased elaborate outfits, had hot twins as back up dancers, played all the hits with enthusiasm and style, jammed, rocked out, and showcased the unique Price sex appeal that launched him to superstardom in the 80’s. His dynamism and tenacity paired with his exceptional musical talents make him, in my opinion, one of the greatest living artists of the day. I highly recommend everyone take in one of his shows, fan or not, no matter what the ticket price is.

For these reasons, and many more, Purple Rain is my favorite song.

Purple Rain lyrics

I never meant to cause you any sorrow
I never meant to cause you any pain
I only wanted one time to see you laughing
I only wanted to see you laughing in the purple rain

Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
I only wanted to see you bathing in the purple rain

I never wanted to be your weekend lover
I only wanted to be some kind of friend, hey
Baby, I could never steal you from another
It's such a shame our friendship had to end

Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
I only wanted to see you underneath the purple rain

Honey, I know, I know, I know times are changin'
It's time we all reach out for something new, that means you too
You say you want a leader, but you can't seem to make up your mind
And I think you better close it and let me guide you to the purple rain

Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
If you know what I'm singin' about up here, come on raise your hand
Purple rain, purple rain
I only want to see you, only want to see you in the purple rain

Next up: My Least Favorite Song

Ode to Coney Island

It is difficult to articulate what exactly it is about Coney Island that I find so lovely. Strolling along the boardwalk there is a faint lingering of still sadness. Although this particular day is humid the high dew point is not what accounts for the heaviness I sense around me. The Coney Island of today is a kitsch filled dilapidated corpse of the grandiose Mecca it had once been. It is difficult to imagine that one hundred (yes one hundred!) years ago this place was teeming with bourgeoisie Victorian families in search of leisure. Even before that it was a tawdry respite for the workingman. Walking along the boardwalk I cannot help but be enthralled with the breadth of existence this place has had. The existence of Coney Island is at once comforting, disturbing, and strangely perplexing.

While sitting at Cha Cha’s, a Coney Island boardwalk bar I am struck by what can only be described as time standing still. Maybe it’s the cheap Sangria but what strikes me about Coney Island is its likeness to a skipping record. It is like a proverbial needle stuck in an eternal groove playing the same endless melody. Time has no place here. Coney Island’s needle is stuck and cannot work itself out and if it could, I am not sure I would want it to. The magic of Coney Island exists in its mesmerizing whimsy. My experience wandering the boardwalk is akin to that of decades of precursors. My own digital photos are even similar in appearance to those taken while film was still in fashion. Located in a large metropolitan area, what is great about Coney Island is that it feels as though it should not exist. Having been to Chicago’s Navy Pier it is perplexing why Coney Island’s fate hasn’t steered toward a more corporate future.

In the mid 20^th century Walt Disney’s disgust with Coney Island inspired him to create his own brand of amusement park. According to an essay appearing in the Journal of Popular Culture (June 1992-cited below) Disney criticized Coney Island for being “dirty, disorganized, poorly run, garish” and “honky-Tonk” (Weinstein 131). Today the island stands in an even greater state of dilapidation. However, what draws me to Coney Island are the exact reasons that turned Disney off. New York is filled with thousands of spaces that serve as a beacon to the past but none transport me the way Coney Island does. Its gruffness makes it undeniably attractive. Maybe it’s because I’m predisposed to amusement park enthusiasm or maybe it’s because the unrecognized potential I see at Coney Island mirrors my own. If Coney Island were a record it would be a beat up Charlie Parker album. Both share a past of amazing success and startling despair. The vinyl would have pops, screeches, and skips in places that would make a music aficionado cringe but, to me, those defects are gold because they are the interesting part of the story. To appreciate the defects is to appreciate/acknowledge the presence (passing) of time as something larger than oneself. The battered and tawdry edifice of the boardwalk is characteristic of what I find so beautiful about the place. There is no beauty in perfection.

A Brief History of Coney Island

Coney Island is a five mile span of beach on the Atlantic Ocean in Brooklyn. It was once separated from Brooklyn by a creek which is how it garnered its “island” status. ‘Discovered’ by Henry Hudson in 1609, it was “part of the land sold to the English in 1643 by the Dutch West India Company” (Weinstein 136). The name Coney Island derives from the rabbits, or “conies”, that inhabited the marshy island at the time. In 1824 construction began to develop it into a seaside resort. By the 1870s it was almost completely stripped of its rustic charms. In the late 1800s a corrupt politician by the name of John Y. McKane had Coney Island in a stranglehold. It had earned a reputation for “immorality, vulgarity, crime, vice, and public disorder” thanks to Mckane’s sanctioning of “voting fraud, illegal land deals, gambling, and prostitution.” In my opinion tarty histories are the best kind (hence-bona roba). In 1894 McKane was sent to the penitentiary and the clean up of the Island began. The reform of Coney Island coincided with late 19^th century advances in technology culminating in the birth of the modern amusement park. Coney Island was transformed from a male dominated den of hedonism to a family friendly (relatively) paradise.

Capitalizing on the practice of selling leisure as a commodity, Coney Island quickly became a fashionable vacation destination. The amusement parks at Coney Island emphasized design, illusion, spectacle, and ambiance and catered to mostly middle-class patrons. America’s first roller coaster opened at Coney Island in 1884 and maxed out at a whopping six miles per hour.

Luna Park

One of the first amusement parks erected was Luna Park, the largest and most popular of the three main parks, which featured live spectacular shows. In an essay appearing in the Smithsonian, Bruce Watson writes, “Luna Park was a fairyland of moons, lagoons and towers. By day it looked like a wedding cake, and by night it looked like a dream.” At Luna Park viewers could be awed by live re-creations of public disaster. One of their main attractions featured the repeated burning of a four story building complete with firemen battling a fiery blaze and people hurling themselves into safety nets.

At Luna Park patrons could take a trip to the moon. Upon a swaying ship replete with the smoke of lift off and starry panoramas, riders would be transported through space to the moon’s alien surface. Once there they were taken through celestial caverns and fed bits of green cheese offered to them by lunar maidens. Other adventures included trips to the North Pole, 20,000 leagues under the sea, and to the Streets of Delhi (with “an astonishing number of real Eastern People”).

There was also a onetime electrocution of an aging elephant. Allegedly the elephant, Topsy, had killed three park visitors, one of whom was attempting to feed her a lit cigarette. After surviving carrots laced with poison it was decided that Thomas Edison would use Topsy to “prove the power of alternating current” (Watson-cited below). Luna Park capitalized on the turn-of-the-century public’s fascination with death, horror, catastrophe, tragedy, and technology.

Dreamland

Dreamland was another of the first three main Coney Island amusement parks. It was built by a group of politicians to be the “Gibraltar of the Amusement World.” Lit by one million light bulbs on its 375-foot Beacon Tower, Dreamland’s magnificent illumination could be seen from miles away in the night sky. If that is not enticing enough, it also featured partially nude female sculptures at its entrance, hired theatrical stars to run concessions, offered live spectacles (such as the Fall of Pompeii), featured a Lilliputian village inhabited by 300 midgets, simulated submarine and airplane rides, a three ring circus, real infant incubators (complete with premature babies), and a ballroom that could accommodate 25,000 dancers. It also had rides, fun houses, and animal shows.

Steeplechase

The last of the three main amusement parks was Steeplechase which catered primarily to working class clientele. Steeplechase featured rapid-motion rides with “sexual overtones”. In rides such as the Wedding Ring, Barrel of Love, and Dew Drop men and women were thrown together creating compromising and embarrassing results. Steeplechase produced cheeks reddened with embarrassment over such improprieties as a lifted skirt or blown off hat. It offered its patrons a reprieve from the harsh standards of Victorian idealism. Revealing my own childish sense of humor I am amused to no end by the fact that Steeplechase had a ride entitled “Blow Hole”. I do not know what this ride entailed but am pretty sure that the image it rouses in my own imagination is most likely better than reality.

On the Boardwalk

Outside on the boardwalk the atmosphere differed. The boardwalk offered numerous types of entertainment from mechanical rides to shooting galleries to freak shows. Also, on the boardwalk, could be found some of the classic Coney Island lurid attractions such as saloons, bathhouses, and more sexually explicit themed exploits. Also to be found on the boardwalk were soon to be famous performers such as Irving Berlin as a singing waiter and Cary Grant on stilts promoting Steeplechase.

The 1910s brought great change for Coney Island. Strict gambling laws were passed in the state of New York and Coney Island lost the draw of its three horseracing tracks. In 1911 Dreamland was completely destroyed in an accidental fire and was never rebuilt. Coney Island was beginning to lose its novelty and excitement to other forms of entertainment. By 1919 Luna Park was turned over to creditors and “the creative spirit behind much of the amusement industry’s technical and visual innovation was lost” (Weinstein 144-145).

The depression caused a major decline in the amusement industry. Only about 500 amusement parks remained in 1936 as compared to 1500 in 1919. Due to very little spending money, large masses and competition prices had to be lowered. According to Weinstein, “The ‘daytrippers’ to Coney left behind on the beach and streets scattered remnants of discarded food, broken bottles, paper wrappings, and other refuse. The Island’s reputation further worsened with its emphasis on ballyhoo, girlie shows, and crooked skill games.” (146) I have no idea what ballyhoo or crooked skill games are but it all still sounds amazing to me.

Sadly, another fire wreaked havoc at Coney Island in 1944 burning Luna Park to the ground not to be rebuilt.

Two main staples still present at modern day Coney Island are the Wonder Wheel and the Cyclone. What differentiates the Wonder Wheel from other Ferris Wheels are its rocking cages that slide along tracks inside a 135-foot disk. According to Watson the Wonder Wheel replaced the Statue of Liberty in 1920 as the first sight immigrants see as they enter New York Harbor. The Cyclone was built in 1927 and features a 60 mph drop. When it first opened a wait could be as long as five hours. Charles Lindbergh was quoted as saying that the Cyclone presents “a greater thrill than flying an airplane at top speed” (Watson). I know, I’ve been on it and I nearly died.

In the 1940s television became the new popular form of entertainment and Coney Island was able to maintain its status as the “capital of amusement” despite its limited offerings and deteriorated condition. New amusement parks were just not being built.

Steeplechase remained the last standing of the three original parks. Its tenure lasted 68 years, finally succumbing to the urban decay of the Island on September 20, 1964. Modern day Coney Island, with its carnival like atmosphere, most resembles Steeplechase.

Modern Day Coney Island

Although being there is somewhat akin to traversing a ghost town I think that Watson is accurate in his comparing Coney Island to a phoenix. Quite literally it has overcome multiple fires but it also, though a little more worse for the wear, has stood the test of time. While it may not draw the crowds of yesteryear it is still a fascinating specimen of Americana. Condemned in 1969, the Cyclone was set for demolition but ultimately saved by a petition signed by fans around the world. At seventy years old, it was rebuilt piece by piece and it still attracts plenty of visitors today. Coney Island’s ability to endure from generation to generation, amidst huge cultural shifts and waning attention spans astounds me (and fills me with a perturbing sense of hope).

In 1980 Dick Zigum, a Yale School of Drama graduate, began Sideshows by the Seashore which produces special events to rejuvenate Coney Island by harkening back to the days of side shows and freak shows. This past summer (2010) Lou Reed and Laurie Anderson reigned as King Neptune and Queen Mermaid in the popular Mermaid Parade. Sideshow by the Seashore features sword swallowers, contortionists, fire-eaters, and more.

Also this past summer, what was formerly Astro-Land reopened as Luna Park. The new management has plans for the park to hearken back to the days of the former Luna Park.

Only time will tell what is to become of the American cultural institution known as Coney Island. Its ubiquity remains untouched. My hope is that it endures many more generations without losing all of its gruff charms.

Roadside America-Sideshow by the Seashore

Lawrence Ferlinghetti- A Coney Island State of mind

“Disneyland and Coney Island: Reflections on the Evolution of the Modern Amusement Park” by Raymond M. Weinstein from the Journal of Popular Culture June 1, 1992 131-164

“Three’s a Crowd, they say, but not at Coney Island!” by Bruce Watson, Smithsonian, Dec96 Vo.27, Issue 9